I mean it's not my fault what my voice sounds like, there's no need for him to refer to it all the time.
Mr Capello has stopped waving his arms around and shouting now. He just wanders about the place, muttering to himself in Italian. Some of the stray cats from the local town have got into our camp and are following him around. He doesn't seem to have noticed. Mr Pearce told us to leave Mr Capello and his cats alone, and that he will do the instructions about the match with Slovakia himself. That is where vampires come from. Ha ha. That's not true, they come from Pennsylvania.
8pm. Hooray! We beat them. We are all so happy. Frank said that they are the smallest country here at the World Cup, but I told him that doesn't always mean they are the worst. My mate Jimmy 'Waffles' O'Leary from the Wirral is only 5 foot tall but he could take on 3 men. That's why I try to keep him on my side when we go out drinking. Frank said I was "dithering on like a flatulent bovine's rump" (which I think must mean 'making valid points') and Wayne asked "take on 3 men at what?" and did a funny gesture with his wrist, and all the lads laughed, but I didn't get it.
At the end of the match, John gathered all the lads together at the end for a huddle, but I am the captain, so I ignored him. He's so rude, but I was looking at him in the shower afterwards, and he does have big muscles, so will leave it alone now I think.
Very big muscles.